On Monday, August 14, 1995, The Oregonian reprinted a Quiz (first printed in 1990) entitled How thrilling is your life story? I was surprised to discover that my score was "Quite awesome. You are probably known as a 'colorful character' who's lots of fun at parties, full of rousing tales and anecdotes. Either that or you cheated."
Either that, or the quiz is too easy. You be the judge.
Let it be known to all mere mortals who dwell upon this planet we call Earth. The Courageous Herb Weiner did in fact Risk life, limb and sanity of mind. Undertaking the truest of all Rites Of Passage. Hurling said body of flesh, bone and spirit off the highest BUNGEE BRIDGE in North America. Twenty Stories, down and up, down and up and down and up on the twenty-second day of the month of February in the Nineteenth Century and Ninety Second year of our Lord. Thus becoming a Charter Member of The Dangerous Sports Club of America Bungee Division. Signed K Casey A. Dale Bungee Master.
For information, call Bungee Masters at (503) 520-0303.
I've rafted the Lower Deschutes River numerous times, and even led a raft of beginners. But my most exciting raft trips have been on the White Salmon River in Washington, including this ride over Husum Falls (a class 5 rapids).
For information, call AAA Rafting at (800) 866-7238.
How about the time I walked across a railroad trestle in Sault St. Marie, Canada. I was unfamiliar with the area, and was with a small group. If a train had come at the wrong time, I would have been forced to jump into the water.
But neither of these was as dangerous as skiing in poor visibility on Mount Hood, when I injured both knees simultaneously while moving so slowly that there wasn't enough force to release my bindings.
Well, I've visited Canada and Mexico (4 pts.)
I've already told you about my exploits in Sault St. Marie.
In Mexico, I picked up a hitchhiker who was about as fluent in English as I was in Spanish. During the hour or so that he rode with me, I was able to explain to him that I had studied Spanish for four years in high school. He was able to explain to me that he worked on a farm, but to this day, I'll never know whether he raised animals or vegetables.
Brooklyn, New York (6 years), Bethpage, New York (12 years), Ithaca, New York (11 years), Poughkeepsie, New York (1 summer), and Portland, Oregon (since 1978).
Come on. This is too easy. I've communicated with a pet cat. When I told him to get off the table, he understood perfectly. He was also quite skilled at communicating with me. I always understood when he was hungry, or wanted to go out.
In 1975, I wrote a freeware compare utility to replace the one supplied by IBM with VM/370 (the other operating system). As far as I know, the program is still popular today, although I haven't worked with IBM systems (including PCs) since 1978. In 1990, out of the blue, I received a phone call from someone who wanted to interview me for a magazine column about this program. The article was published in Technical Support, ISSN 1052-2581, Volume 5, Number 5, April 1991, "VM Toolbox: Compare XCOMPARE with COMPARE," by John D. Kinne.
I am coauthor of Beyond Tacos: Mexican Cuisine
I am the inventor of Method and Apparatus for Creating a Structured Image Data Set based upon Acquired Image Data, U.S. Patent Number 4,625,288, issued November 25, 1986, and used by Tektronix in the 4991S1 Graphic Input Workstation. The user interface concepts pioneered by the 4991S1 were later adopted by Adobe Illustrator. Here's a Technical Report describing this invention.
When I was a child growing up on Long Island, hurricanes were a fairly common occurrence. One of the stronger hurricanes I survived toppled a weeping willow tree growing on the side of our house. Fortunately, it fell toward the back of the house. If it had hit the house, it would have taken my bedroom with it. The first time I ever saw a chainsaw was when the men came to cut up and haul away the tree.
As my T-Shirt says, "I survived the Great Oregon Quake." My wife and I were awakened by the vibrations in our waterbed the morning of March 25, 1993. It felt like the rumble of a huge truck outside of our house, except that it didn't stop. We then realized that we were experiencing an earthquake. We were fortunate that there was no damage.
On Wednesday evening before Thanksgiving, 1974, I broke my ankle when I slipped on the ice walking down my driveway to pick up my mail. I spent Thanksgiving in the hospital room with two other men, one of whom was a heavy smoker (not a very healthy environment for sick and injured people to recover). My two roommates received wine with their Thanksgiving dinners, but I did not, since I did not have the foresight to select my menu 24 hours in advance.
My house has been burglarized. (I now have an alarm system.)
The May 18, 1980 eruption of Mount St. Helens covered my house and yard with a thin layer of ash. It was several days before it was safe to drive. (The volcanic ash was extremely abrasive, and would destroy a car engine if it was drawn into the air intake.)
When I was in college, I helped steal a road sign (it was too big for one person to handle alone).
(Well, there were two of us. Does that mean I get 10 pts? OK, it doesn't hurt to ask.) Before I was married, I had an affair with a married woman.
In my younger days, I smoked marijuana, and I did inhale. I guess I'll never be president.
Well, this is a Catch-22. Nobody reading my life story is going to give me 10 points for something I refuse to mention, and I don't get any points for anything I do mention.
When I was a freshman in college, and received a small income tax return check from the IRS, I decided to stir up a little trouble. At that time, the tax return checks were printed on computer punch cards. With the aid of a keypunch machine, I was able to interpret the data punched into the check: it contained my social security number, the amount of the check (let's call it 63.17), and some miscellaneous additional information. With the aid of the keypunch machine, I added an extra hole, changing the 63.17 to 163.17. I then cashed the check for $63.17 (I did not alter the printed amount). I never heard anything from the IRS, but the next year, the checks had leading zeroes. Did the IRS waste lots of time trying to figure out why their books were out of balance by $100? I hope so!
I've been married twice and divorced once.
My mother passed away unexpectedly in 1993. Here's a poem she wrote shortly before she died.
The Ithaca (New York) reservior was a popular swimming location. Clothing was optional. Most visitors (myself included) preferred their birthday suits. Occasionally, the Ithaca police would receive a complaint that the "hippies are swimming nude in the reservior." (Swimming in the reservior was illegal, with or without clothes.) The police would come by, and everyone would get dressed and leave. The police would then radio in that "there's nobody here now" and leave. Half an hour later, people would be swimming again.
I designed and taught the Introduction to Software Engineering course for Portland Community College and Clackamas Community College.
Easy come, easy go.
Hey! Not only do I surf the net, I also build the beaches, to make the surfing better for the everyone else!
The Sporting Life Bungee Jumping 25 White Water Rafting 10 Bonus 15 50 Trotting the Globe Foreign Countries 4 Cities 5 9 Into the Unknown Nonhuman Life Form 20 20 Fame and Fortune Magazine Story 10 Written a Book 20 Invented Something 30 60 Death and Disaster Hurricane 10 Earthquake 5 Broken a Bone 10 Victim of Felony 10 Volcano 15 50 The Dark Side Committed a Crime 5 Illicit Affair 5 Illegal Drugs 5 Bonus Points 0 15 Everyday Drama Been Married 20 Death of a Parent 10 Nude Beach 5 Bonus Points 20 55 UH-OH! Penalty Section Sit behind a Desk -5 Surf the Internet -5 -10 Total 249 points